Monday, June 8, 2009

Nitelite review or rantings of a madman? You make the call!

I told Kimmie I'd guest-post on her blog, but haven't found any time to write. I did, however, find this odd little missive that might pass as a review of The Nitelite. It was tucked into a seldom-used corner of my hard drive. Hmmm...

Typical Seattle! The maelstrom at 2nd and Pine caused my Up-Armored Urban Assault Umbrella (AUAUAU) to flip-flop, becoming a giant black tulip. Piece of junk.

Bob’s crappy spy gear store is, well, just a waste of my money. In fact, if his sure-fire Eavesdropping Countermeasures had actually worked, I wouldn’t even be in this predicament. But that’s a whole ‘nother story – back to the umbrella!

As you know, I can’t bear to be without one downtown. Nanty Glo, my arch-nemesis, will stop at nothing to have paint dumped on me from above. Paint, or even viler stuff. I NEED the umbrella, clearly.

I continue north, tossing the remnants of the AUAUAU into the construction pit. This is my favorite block in town right now, no paint-dumping here! I stop for a brief moment and savor the sense of peace and quiet a simple hole in the ground engenders in me.

Halfway up the next block, though, and the buildings are becoming menacing. Spies everywhere! Cursed Nanty Glo!

I spot the sign: Nitelite. Half a glance reveals dive bar. Good. A dive bar is perhaps the last remaining place where being a pretentious ass won’t get you anything. Lawyers and politicians, among others, are turds in the punchbowl here. Which means I’m safe.

And surprised! Good food, good drinks poured strong, and good prices. I’d never noticed this place before, but it’s my second home now. Well, until someone finds this and Nanty’s minions come looking…

FOOD: decent to very good, inexpensive. The tamale dinner was delicious.
DRINKS: inexpensive and well-poured cocktails, several beers on tap
PEOPLE: mix of ages, backgrounds, conversations… quite a few regulars, some real characters (includes staff), and best of all, none of Nanty Glo’s minions are about.
BATHROOMS: (pool side only, haven’t been to the bathrooms on the main bar side) Unisex. Can smell of urine (guys can’t aim). Air dryer, no paper towels.
JUKEBOX: pretty much what you’d expect: classic rock, Bob Marley, Motown, Johnny Cash… the dive bar standards.
NOTES: Cash only. Outdoor seating available. Additional room with pool tables and darts is open Wed-Sun.

Nitelite on Urbanspoon

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